whiteout – review

10 09 2009

whiteout movie posteri would be extremely surprised to find a good review of kate beckinsale’s newest movie “whiteout”!  she stars as carrie stetko, a us marshal stationed at a scientific base in antarctica.  it’s not that her acting in it wasn’t up to par…her and everyone else are quite solid.  it’s the story that took two hours out of my life that unfortunately i’ll never get back.

i think the breakdown comes from the initial  premise of the movie which i think is supposed to be greed, specifically greed for these diamonds (lost in a russian plane crash 60 years prior) that drives this conspiracy for murder.  that’s all well and good but i don’t buy it!  there are tons of diamonds and supposedly four guys who find them.  no one else knows about their finding and no one else (ie. russian government, etc) is looking for them either.  so really all they have to do is put them in their pockets and go home.  end of movie.  but no!  let’s use the winter storm in antarctica be the backdrop for murder and suspense…who murdered whom?

i should point out that thank god i didn’t actually waste my own money on this (i won tickets to a pre-screening).  ok, on with the review!

i really think the writers were trying to create some depth to beckinsale’s character by adding a continual flashback that explains (sort of but not really) why she ends up in the south pole and maybe why she’s paranoid.  i found that it didn’t further the plot at all.  and why wouldn’t she be paranoid when some freak killer is on the loose on an isolated antarctic base?  ugh!

anyway, in the end these diamonds just don’t seem enough justification for all the killing that happens in this movie.  and then to let the killer just walk out into the whiteout and kill himself??  really??  anti-climactic to say the least.  and finally, there’s so little to do with the actual whiteout that shares the movie’s title that it makes you wonder why they couldn’t at least come up with a better title!  to sum it all up –  i was bored!  throw in an abominable snowman or some vampires (a la other beckinsale movies) and maybe we’d have a film…but better to just “whiteout” this choice next time you’re deciding what to see 😉  i’m giving it a 2 kicks to the balls out of 5 (i would’ve given it 1 but beckinsale is hot and had one scene showing that beautiful body)!

kick to the ballskick to the balls

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